I understand your fear of rain-X (my brother won't use it either) but done correctly it can be your best friend. First off try to find this.http://image.fourwheeler.com/f/revie...e-and-wipe.jpg
It can be hard to find but worth the search. I found mine at K-mart.
This do-hickie is by far the best way to apply Rain-X and keep it off your paint. I repeat keep it off your paint! It is an alcohol based product and it will mess with your clear coat.
Next, Stoner invisible glass is a fine product (I use it myself) but save it for the inside of the glass. It doesn't play well with Rain-X. Windex will work fine.
The glass should be cool not cold and don't even try it if it is humid or near dusk.
You have to do it quickly. If you take too long it will make things difficult.
Start with the windshield.Use the applicator in even swirls. The key here is not to use too much. If the swirls start to run you are using too much. A little goes a long way.
Work your way around the car. By the time you get back to the windshield it will be dry enough for the next step.Don't forget the mirrors.
Now,using the towel provided with the applicator wipe off all the Rain-X you can starting with the windshield and work your way around. This will make an even haze on the glass. Avoid hitting the soft moldings as it will smear onto the cloth reducing its life. Set the cloth aside. Your done with it until next time.
Next,I use paper towels. The ones you find at your favorite barbeque restaurant work the best and they don't seem to mind if you take a lot of them. Or you can just buy them. They are the folded rectangular ones. With the paper towels work your way around the car using a fast polishing motion.
Know this,any time you stop or change direction it will leave a smear. Just keep going until you don't see anymore smears. Sprinkle water on the glass to speed this up. If you used too much Rain-X use more water. Remember,a quick polishing motion.
I usually do this twice a year. Once in the spring and once in the fall. It sounds like a lot of work but it's more work to chisel ice off my window in the winter and bugs in the summer. It also makes your wipers last longer. It won't last as long on the front windshield as it does in the side windows. You may have to reapply on the windshield mid season. Using Rain-X wiper fluid will help this.
The biggest mistake people make is using too much.
I hope this helps. If my mom can do it you can do it. Good luck.